Obsidian Eagle's Blasphemous Bazaar - avant-garde poetics, indie publishing, nom-de-plume

Obsidian Eagle's

Blasphemous Bazaar


META-Poems For A New Millennium

<br>META-Poems For A New Millennium<br><br>

The Flagship of Anti-Poetry — est. 2010





Charlemagne by Guest Bard Kerin Gedge

Today's poetical history lesson comes to us courtesy of Kerin Gedge. Check out his project: The Vocabuverse.

Kerin Gedge, a projectionist coping with the lack of much to do when his Employer went digital years ago, decided to use his downtime to rewrite the English Dictionary as poetry (mainly because he'd always wanted to read it but frankly found it boring). Recently made redundant thanks to technology,  Kerin lives in New Zealand and is exploring career options in between writing The Vocabuverse as well as being a full time Dad!



Charlemagne


There was a king called Charlemagne
Charles the first also his name 

King of the Franks in seven sixty eight 
Later on a King in Italy
Remembered throughout history
By his designation: Charles the Great!

Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell
The books about those days do tell
He was the first in three whole centuries 

To bear the title “Emperor”, 
And Holy Roman Emperor, 
Crowned so by Pope Leo number three.
 

After fall of Roman Empire
He was the first king to acquire
Most of Western Europe in his grasp 

Which he ruled for thirteen years 
Until he left earth’s mortal sphere 
In eight one four when alas he breathed his last.

 "To have another language is to possess a second soul." ~ Charlemagne
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.U4iQjeJI.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.D6bYsnGj.dpuf
There was a king called Charlemagne Charles the first also his name king of the Franks in seven sixty eight later the king of Italy remembered throughout history by the designation Charles the Great! Since in the West Rome’s Empire fell the books about those days do tell he was the first in three whole centuries to bear the title “Emperor”, the Holy Roman Emperor, crowned so by Pope Leo number three. Since the Roman Empire he was the first king to acquire most of Western Europe in his grasp of which he ruled for 13 years until he left earth’s mortal sphere in eight one four when he breathed his last. - See more at: http://vocabuverse.blogspot.ca/2013/06/c-words.html#sthash.D6bYsnGj.dpuf

Paradigmatic

Paradigmatic


Rough around the edges

Round rhymes for square wedges

Hidden away behind thick hedges


Produced as memory dredges

Double-crossed by disloyal pledges

Innocent of anything anyone alleges


Stays unfazed if hit with sledges

Hope it hangs from highest ledges

Like streamlined arrows given fledges 

Ça suffit — close up your ledgers!


Over-Rhyme:

Imagination rarely stretches

What a poor price knowing fetches

Even learning barely etches

Credible or discernible sketches.


Author's Note: If you enjoyed this piece then you may want to read its poetic successor: Anathematic.

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